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I know that we have huge problems with obesity in Black communities.

I have thought long and hard about my relationship to food (and exercise), and I have started to make some changes in order to remain healthy.

The idea that we’re only attractive within a range of sizes is absurd. The homeboy of one of my homegirls happened to be in the club. My homegirl indicated to me at some point that I should make sure to meet him, because she thought we’d have similar interests.

Not one to be shy, I did at some point attempt to strike up a conversation. I mean he literally didn’t look me in the eye, made no real attempt at conversation, and pretty much gave me the brush off.

It was clear to me that he wasn’t really that interested in a serious thing with any of the girls at the bar that night. But why the cold shoulder, from a brother I’d never met?

Why the unique snub reserved for the one fat girl in the crew?

Nothing can make me dance with abandon like a smoke-filled club strung out on CRUNK.

And when me and my girls would go and shut the club down, routinely, I’d be the only chick that hadn’t been approached, danced with, hit on.

The number will usually total up to no more than 2 or 3 mind you.As un-feminist as I’m sure it is, and as much my Sagittarian self wants to say f**k the world and embrace my life of singleness in a blaze of principled feminist big girl glory, the #truestory is that I’m seriously trying to figure out how I can get my J. I also know being thinner won’t guarantee me a date, but I’m willing to bet it’ll improve my chances. Feel free to weigh in in the comments on your experiences dating as a big girl, your thoughts on the sometimes un-feminist things we do for love, or anything else you wanna say. Those stories ring hollow, because they ultimately amount to a futile attempt to amass enough exceptions to disprove the rule.Moreover, perhaps folks aren’t considering that the partner-less fat girls simply remain invisible to you, and the thick girls with guys are visible, precisely because they are an anomaly.

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They see girls like me as sisters, as homegirls, but not as love options, because they don’t find big girls sexy.

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